So it's that time of year again. less than a week from now the gang is going to be shipping back home. For chestnuts roasted on an open fire, and taking in the time with family. You know come to think of it I did not want to let anyone know I was coming home, I mean you get pulled limb from limb from all the ones who wanna see you, and you don't know how to say you don't have that kind of time. But since I'm going to share this on facebook anyway I'm not really worried.
I rode up to Waterford Lakes tonight, got a chai and read some of Tour Smart if you wanna know what that is you can ask me. Well it was nice I wanted to get the dvd, I went to Barnes, and Movie stop then went to best buy and it's all online, nice huh oh well it was nice out, cool and breezy, but it was nice taking the time to go out there and the book was really worth it. I was out 25 bucks, and that from my loans but I mean it's just makes me more ready for my career and to me that's worth 25 bucks. Went to best buy and checked out thire music section had a Fender Hot Rod for 600 minus 25 percent. Man it stinks not having money plus I found out that Saboteur is out and I can't get it. Oh Well.
I had an epiphany wile I was out. I know when I go home savoring is the name of the game. right down to how the air feel on my hand. Reaping the benefits of hard works and this may be the only time I will be home. It hard to explain to your loved ones why the drifting. I feel bad and I want them to know I love them, but right now I'm not at the point where I can devote time to them. It's not that I hate being home I mean thats really not it it's just.. well I'll explain by telling my epiphany. I found that while I am excited to be back home as for sure I swear on the bible this is the truth, but I see that I know that my life at Full Sail is the life I currently only know. I don't know what's going on back home, and no one tells anything. There is this pandemic of introverts and insecurities and me being so far away there no new info of whats going on. I can roll with the punches as far as what is happening to my territory, but with my friends it hurts, and it's really uncomfortable it's getting to the point where I'm actually getting angry and bitter. It's not even that it only can be bad news it can be good new buy all means but I need to be aware of it. Readjusting to the surroundings are way more easier for someone moving back home than it is socially because of the human element. Now I'm not choosing to hate I mean I love my friends and they're family to me. It's just that it's something that I feel strongly about and I just would like to feel a little more connected to home, well to be short anyway.
This week we're finishing up the ark of projects that we have. It's great it's going by so fast, and this month as far as curriculum was pretty disappointing and I felt I didn't learns as much as we could have or as much as I wanted to. But hey you make the most out of it. I leave on Saturday and I get home in the afternoon, I think some of the gang is going away for the holidays, maybe Maine, I'm gonna be going to my aunts up in Fremont most likely. This week I'm gonna get ready with things i'm going to pack and Early morning flights on the day I'm going should be pretty easy, better than night when I came home last time we were stopping a jet on ice it was fun and all but I mean it's logan if you miss or go over the runway you end up in the Atlantic. But hey I'm just super grateful to be going home, and having a true real Christmas. You know trees are 75 bucks down here in the swamp. tis crazy. Well Merry Christmas to all, God Bless us, Everyone.
Saturday, December 12, 2009
Friday, October 30, 2009
Halloween Memo
On October 31st, most of the world celebrates all Hallows Eve. Or Halloween as it is commonly known. when night falls something happens to us. We become one of our many fantasies, and dress up to be in congregation with others. It is a social event, a gala, and a very happy and whimsical time.
I write this not only because this is another October I will miss in one of the most if not the single most fabulous place to have Halloween. In New England a staple of it’s peoples culture is the Autumn night that is Halloween. But in relation to where I am now I try and do my best to keep the holiday close to me.
I think what makes Halloween and even more prevalent holiday is not just the trick or treating. Nor is it the costumes that all the kids and adults put on. I think why it is such a staple is because of our geographical location. New England is able to take pride in ll the four seasons. One of witch being Autumn, and I think that this created this aura of the very beginning of Halloween. Also with the stories and the actions of the Salem Witch Trials, a key image in Halloween was made through the Which.
It is the time during this holiday when we can meet our fears face to face. We carry on the tradition of an ancient Irish tradition, and with Boston being an Irish city, New England itself has had numerous ties through the years to the Eve of all Hallows. Once again The events that took place in the region has had a great affect on the traditions of Halloween.
From the carving of Jack O’ Lanterns. Witch stemmed from a story about a mean and horrible man named Jack O Lantern who was so mean that he was not allowed up to heaven and was rejected by hell and was forced to walk the earth. This was once done in Northern Europe by carving a turnip. But with the Pumpkins in New England it has been reinvented. Then onto Apple bobbing, and of course the telling of ghost stories.
I hope that everyone in the world, and especially everyone in New England has a safe and happy Halloween. Share in the joy of friends and loved ones, and take part in one of the worlds oldest traditions, as well as a night that puts the region on the map. Tell many stories of loved ones gone, and make your face wet as you bob for apples, as the night that symbolized the onset of winter commences.
I write this not only because this is another October I will miss in one of the most if not the single most fabulous place to have Halloween. In New England a staple of it’s peoples culture is the Autumn night that is Halloween. But in relation to where I am now I try and do my best to keep the holiday close to me.
I think what makes Halloween and even more prevalent holiday is not just the trick or treating. Nor is it the costumes that all the kids and adults put on. I think why it is such a staple is because of our geographical location. New England is able to take pride in ll the four seasons. One of witch being Autumn, and I think that this created this aura of the very beginning of Halloween. Also with the stories and the actions of the Salem Witch Trials, a key image in Halloween was made through the Which.
It is the time during this holiday when we can meet our fears face to face. We carry on the tradition of an ancient Irish tradition, and with Boston being an Irish city, New England itself has had numerous ties through the years to the Eve of all Hallows. Once again The events that took place in the region has had a great affect on the traditions of Halloween.
From the carving of Jack O’ Lanterns. Witch stemmed from a story about a mean and horrible man named Jack O Lantern who was so mean that he was not allowed up to heaven and was rejected by hell and was forced to walk the earth. This was once done in Northern Europe by carving a turnip. But with the Pumpkins in New England it has been reinvented. Then onto Apple bobbing, and of course the telling of ghost stories.
I hope that everyone in the world, and especially everyone in New England has a safe and happy Halloween. Share in the joy of friends and loved ones, and take part in one of the worlds oldest traditions, as well as a night that puts the region on the map. Tell many stories of loved ones gone, and make your face wet as you bob for apples, as the night that symbolized the onset of winter commences.
Sunday, October 11, 2009
Hearts Falling Like Leaves
I sit in torn despair as I am reminded of loves that I miss. I remember the little things that come to mind head and warm my heart. In the present day, individuals, and peoples of the United States Of America try and go about their daily lives. Yet a beast lurks in the underbelly. That underbelly is in effect our political structure.
Although the strain we struggle everyday. we struggle with going to work. We struggle with our marriage, to stay on the faithful and loving path. We struggle with ourselves deciding the everyday conscious decision that cone up. We have made mistakes and now we are suffering for them. In the wake of 9/11 61 percent though our country was changing for the better. But still the snake lies in the garden and has not only tempted us has hogtied us, into the lies that they spill about caring for us or our country. Instead there real agenda is to “win” they want their party to rule even at the expense of the people.
In what is known by other names but I will name these times as “ The Meanest of Times” , those who want and remember liberty try to find solace. I am no exception. As our hearts weigh heavy on us the things that we see and seek however little give us hope. A hope that there still is a way.
The other day I was in the local music store. Not to far from the Borders Book Store where I am currently writing this. I was there to purchase a new Bass guitar. I have been working to save up for this, and Now having enough cash I went to purchase it. However I was entering into a nightmare with this ordeal. I suppose commonsense dictates that when you buy something like an article of clothing, you pay for it and you walk out of the store and you try them on or wait a few days and wear them to work. The same is true for something like a new LED Tv. When you walk out of best buy and get home you should be able to hook it up and let her rip. Common sense did not succeed in this battle. This was due to a person who is sitting at a warehouse and all he does is use a forklift takes the instrument sticks a label on it and it’s off to UPS. This is just like the way it is in Washington. We believe the lies, vote for a color instead of character and what ensues is absolutely crappy leadership that is full of deceit, selfishness, and utter stupidity.
However in this wake. I now begin to tell of the lighter side of things. Wile holding my what was suppose to be Five string Bass. I now hold a four string in my hands. It’s carved solid body attached to a light maple neck. This begins my memories. As I hold my Bass I remember Simon & Patrick Luthiers. They are one of my favorite brands. They are own by Godin Guitars and their based in canada but they are assembled in New Hampshire. They have a big connection with their product not only in the making of but with the customers as well. I remember holding one and the neck made from Silver Leaf Maple witch is found in Canada started a string of memories that make my heart flutter with hope and the desire to help in overcoming the struggles.
The wood little grains reminded me of the fall that once again has slipped by me. In doing so the local globe from my home has an article of fall activities that should be done in New England. This coupled with the wood reminded me of fleece. My fleece vest thats not only I but a big majority of New Englanders wear when the greatest season starts to befall the region. The days grow chili, but sunny, and the colors of Autumn come in to view. We start to get out our turtlenecks, and our L.L Bean boots, and join with friends and family. I remember the coming of Starbuck’s Pumpkin Spice Latte, and as for the bikers out there and those asphalt kings, the roads still welcome their company. Although when it hits 50 degrees for those who don’t ride it’s about time to stow your chrome lady away for the winter. 50 is 40 in riders temp due to the exposure so wile it’s still 60 during the day the ride is still on. This time of year folks around might know of the Lazy Lion up in New Hampshire. What a great place to enjoy during the fall. It’s under new bosses now but still the place is great. I remember the last time I was there in the fall and knowing I will see it again gives me a little more resolve and makes my heart beat a little easier.
Even when working in the fall, when in New England it can’t go all bad. Gridlock traffic paves way for a nice look at the foliage happening and the ancient trees sway with the hollowed wind. The Pumpkin chucking with the Trebuchets near Peterson, and the events going on at the historical Salem Mass. The fall classic, and pumpkin picking with your folks, and the road trips with your closest friends to North Conway, and Sabago Lake. Those are the memories and reasons to be resolved and to hold on an struggle for those little things and those special times hang on and start to ask questions, demand true answers, and demand character, liberty, fairness, and freedom. Hold on and make those things become closer to being realized because with out those things, our future of fleece will be jeopardized, and our hearts will fall, like a colored leave from a fall struck tree.
Although the strain we struggle everyday. we struggle with going to work. We struggle with our marriage, to stay on the faithful and loving path. We struggle with ourselves deciding the everyday conscious decision that cone up. We have made mistakes and now we are suffering for them. In the wake of 9/11 61 percent though our country was changing for the better. But still the snake lies in the garden and has not only tempted us has hogtied us, into the lies that they spill about caring for us or our country. Instead there real agenda is to “win” they want their party to rule even at the expense of the people.
In what is known by other names but I will name these times as “ The Meanest of Times” , those who want and remember liberty try to find solace. I am no exception. As our hearts weigh heavy on us the things that we see and seek however little give us hope. A hope that there still is a way.
The other day I was in the local music store. Not to far from the Borders Book Store where I am currently writing this. I was there to purchase a new Bass guitar. I have been working to save up for this, and Now having enough cash I went to purchase it. However I was entering into a nightmare with this ordeal. I suppose commonsense dictates that when you buy something like an article of clothing, you pay for it and you walk out of the store and you try them on or wait a few days and wear them to work. The same is true for something like a new LED Tv. When you walk out of best buy and get home you should be able to hook it up and let her rip. Common sense did not succeed in this battle. This was due to a person who is sitting at a warehouse and all he does is use a forklift takes the instrument sticks a label on it and it’s off to UPS. This is just like the way it is in Washington. We believe the lies, vote for a color instead of character and what ensues is absolutely crappy leadership that is full of deceit, selfishness, and utter stupidity.
However in this wake. I now begin to tell of the lighter side of things. Wile holding my what was suppose to be Five string Bass. I now hold a four string in my hands. It’s carved solid body attached to a light maple neck. This begins my memories. As I hold my Bass I remember Simon & Patrick Luthiers. They are one of my favorite brands. They are own by Godin Guitars and their based in canada but they are assembled in New Hampshire. They have a big connection with their product not only in the making of but with the customers as well. I remember holding one and the neck made from Silver Leaf Maple witch is found in Canada started a string of memories that make my heart flutter with hope and the desire to help in overcoming the struggles.
The wood little grains reminded me of the fall that once again has slipped by me. In doing so the local globe from my home has an article of fall activities that should be done in New England. This coupled with the wood reminded me of fleece. My fleece vest thats not only I but a big majority of New Englanders wear when the greatest season starts to befall the region. The days grow chili, but sunny, and the colors of Autumn come in to view. We start to get out our turtlenecks, and our L.L Bean boots, and join with friends and family. I remember the coming of Starbuck’s Pumpkin Spice Latte, and as for the bikers out there and those asphalt kings, the roads still welcome their company. Although when it hits 50 degrees for those who don’t ride it’s about time to stow your chrome lady away for the winter. 50 is 40 in riders temp due to the exposure so wile it’s still 60 during the day the ride is still on. This time of year folks around might know of the Lazy Lion up in New Hampshire. What a great place to enjoy during the fall. It’s under new bosses now but still the place is great. I remember the last time I was there in the fall and knowing I will see it again gives me a little more resolve and makes my heart beat a little easier.
Even when working in the fall, when in New England it can’t go all bad. Gridlock traffic paves way for a nice look at the foliage happening and the ancient trees sway with the hollowed wind. The Pumpkin chucking with the Trebuchets near Peterson, and the events going on at the historical Salem Mass. The fall classic, and pumpkin picking with your folks, and the road trips with your closest friends to North Conway, and Sabago Lake. Those are the memories and reasons to be resolved and to hold on an struggle for those little things and those special times hang on and start to ask questions, demand true answers, and demand character, liberty, fairness, and freedom. Hold on and make those things become closer to being realized because with out those things, our future of fleece will be jeopardized, and our hearts will fall, like a colored leave from a fall struck tree.
Sunday, October 4, 2009
Welcome To the Swamp
As the doors to the port open, the wave of humidity rushes at me. Jee what a surprise, as I now have trouble breathing. No clouds in the blue sky, two wheel drive trucks rolling by. Certainly not much has changed here.
I call it the other world. A place trapped in a sandbox, or rotting vegetation, both are valid options. Driving home we catch up on life outside the swamp. I pull up to that familiar stucco covered building. I look around; the place is rather empty. The holly Berry tree is in bloom, a sign f the coming season. At least my place is clean, I make sure everything is there.
You know that night I dinned on pop cord and a nutrtigrain bar. I had to go to the grocery store. Around town it’s all the same, all the familiar sights. I was thinking that they were way more familiar than I wanted them to be., but oh well a deals a deal. I went for a couple of errands and got back; sunny rides well, much better than dads ranger, he’d better get that fixed before X-Mas, guess now sunny is a southern bell. So I get home and what happens, sun goes away and BAM! Down pour, welcome to the swamp.
I kind of have this thing with hygiene (laughs) I didn’t really need braces as a kid but my mom wanted me to get them for cosmetic reasons. It paid off pretty well. Then come the white teeth, and boy till this day I guess I have it down to an exact science. Big mouth guy, especially in my craft I mean having white teeth on stage is pretty damn important. I guess it’s part of my shtick you know I take my health pretty seriously and I think people who take care of themselves have more respect for themselves as well.
I think what made me think of my smile was how I was a younger kid. I think part of me being a religious person is the fact that I remember how bad and mean I was to my parents, especially my mom. I guess it was just growing plain stuff but I think it’s just one of those things that is a constant reminder. I hit my mom once not like punched her or anything but I did it in front of some kids I went to school with, even verbally. I remember there was this time when my mom would come home late. I got pretty jealous and thought it was some kind of affair between her, witch obviously turned out to be ridiculous and from the get go completely false, but I left a message on her machine at work basically blasting her, and I remember her being so hurtful, and I never forgot that. I mean I did this to like my best friend, the person that gave me this chance at the game called Life. I guess we all were young. It was just one of those things that stuck with me, guess it was kind of this wake up call even though it wouldn’t wake me up until later on in life. One of the things I hold in high regard id respect for ones parents. Especially this day in age we are increasingly adverse to our parents. Maybe it’s because parents can’t discipline their kids like they use to do. Hey I wasn’t a a millennium kid I was before the west coast invasion of Nirvana, and Sound garden, parents still gave their kids a slap now and then.
Now a days you tell someone that your parents smacked your ass and they end up asking how you rebelled against it; During this time I can do nothing but give wry smile. I still hug my old man in public, and my mom is like my best friend. I look at all the things I could have became and the many people I didn’t want to become. Everyday I see examples of all the nothingness that I am not. For me that puts a smile on my face, You know weather better for worse loving parents help you become a better person. We try and see a little as possible of them when we are younger, and by the time we stop to turn around they stopped at the grand station.
So this week was my first week back in the Swamp. Well I can’t say it’s all bad. Talking to my mom the other day, I guess when we got our orientation I got to thinkin; I think it’s best for me, and as a matter of fact I feel in my soul or gut either way, that right now staying a bachelor is the way to go. I think that the age I am witch is very young still that things are complicated right now. I told myself that I really didn’t have time for anyone else wile I was getting my degree, and it still goes for this semester in Music buisness. Being a student especially a Full Sail one is a full time job. I fell also that this just isn’t the time yet, I’m not established I’m still running to start my journey, and the right ducks just aren’t lined up yet. Now me be able to live without being in a relationship. Well hey there is a time and place for everything, and this just isn’t my time yet. It’s going to happen but I know deep inside that it just isn’t now. I’m rather at peace with it. I like the way things are. I come and go as I please, and I’m left to my own devices. I get to concentrate on the immediate things of important like school and my Music. I’ll admit it gets hard sometimes. You love every minute of everyday that you are alive, You devote yourself to what you believe in, and make sacrifices that not a lot of people can make. But you know the payoff, in your head of why in the end it will all be worth it, for you that may not much to go on a thought, but to me it’s gold. Fot me it’s just the right thing, so welcome to the Swamp.
I call it the other world. A place trapped in a sandbox, or rotting vegetation, both are valid options. Driving home we catch up on life outside the swamp. I pull up to that familiar stucco covered building. I look around; the place is rather empty. The holly Berry tree is in bloom, a sign f the coming season. At least my place is clean, I make sure everything is there.
You know that night I dinned on pop cord and a nutrtigrain bar. I had to go to the grocery store. Around town it’s all the same, all the familiar sights. I was thinking that they were way more familiar than I wanted them to be., but oh well a deals a deal. I went for a couple of errands and got back; sunny rides well, much better than dads ranger, he’d better get that fixed before X-Mas, guess now sunny is a southern bell. So I get home and what happens, sun goes away and BAM! Down pour, welcome to the swamp.
I kind of have this thing with hygiene (laughs) I didn’t really need braces as a kid but my mom wanted me to get them for cosmetic reasons. It paid off pretty well. Then come the white teeth, and boy till this day I guess I have it down to an exact science. Big mouth guy, especially in my craft I mean having white teeth on stage is pretty damn important. I guess it’s part of my shtick you know I take my health pretty seriously and I think people who take care of themselves have more respect for themselves as well.
I think what made me think of my smile was how I was a younger kid. I think part of me being a religious person is the fact that I remember how bad and mean I was to my parents, especially my mom. I guess it was just growing plain stuff but I think it’s just one of those things that is a constant reminder. I hit my mom once not like punched her or anything but I did it in front of some kids I went to school with, even verbally. I remember there was this time when my mom would come home late. I got pretty jealous and thought it was some kind of affair between her, witch obviously turned out to be ridiculous and from the get go completely false, but I left a message on her machine at work basically blasting her, and I remember her being so hurtful, and I never forgot that. I mean I did this to like my best friend, the person that gave me this chance at the game called Life. I guess we all were young. It was just one of those things that stuck with me, guess it was kind of this wake up call even though it wouldn’t wake me up until later on in life. One of the things I hold in high regard id respect for ones parents. Especially this day in age we are increasingly adverse to our parents. Maybe it’s because parents can’t discipline their kids like they use to do. Hey I wasn’t a a millennium kid I was before the west coast invasion of Nirvana, and Sound garden, parents still gave their kids a slap now and then.
Now a days you tell someone that your parents smacked your ass and they end up asking how you rebelled against it; During this time I can do nothing but give wry smile. I still hug my old man in public, and my mom is like my best friend. I look at all the things I could have became and the many people I didn’t want to become. Everyday I see examples of all the nothingness that I am not. For me that puts a smile on my face, You know weather better for worse loving parents help you become a better person. We try and see a little as possible of them when we are younger, and by the time we stop to turn around they stopped at the grand station.
So this week was my first week back in the Swamp. Well I can’t say it’s all bad. Talking to my mom the other day, I guess when we got our orientation I got to thinkin; I think it’s best for me, and as a matter of fact I feel in my soul or gut either way, that right now staying a bachelor is the way to go. I think that the age I am witch is very young still that things are complicated right now. I told myself that I really didn’t have time for anyone else wile I was getting my degree, and it still goes for this semester in Music buisness. Being a student especially a Full Sail one is a full time job. I fell also that this just isn’t the time yet, I’m not established I’m still running to start my journey, and the right ducks just aren’t lined up yet. Now me be able to live without being in a relationship. Well hey there is a time and place for everything, and this just isn’t my time yet. It’s going to happen but I know deep inside that it just isn’t now. I’m rather at peace with it. I like the way things are. I come and go as I please, and I’m left to my own devices. I get to concentrate on the immediate things of important like school and my Music. I’ll admit it gets hard sometimes. You love every minute of everyday that you are alive, You devote yourself to what you believe in, and make sacrifices that not a lot of people can make. But you know the payoff, in your head of why in the end it will all be worth it, for you that may not much to go on a thought, but to me it’s gold. Fot me it’s just the right thing, so welcome to the Swamp.
Thursday, September 24, 2009
It's Almost Like
I guess it is safe to say that I am stuck in a rut. I'm moving around and all I see is four walls. It was really nice being home. But I think the thing that got me most was how unadjusted I am to it. I got home after graduation and I saw that evertything did a flip on it's side. Nothing is the same, and I realized it the hard way. I always tried to know where I was going. I came home to the home I always knew, but in that home there were now different people living in it.
It's almost like, I'm stuck in a rut. I now want to back to that far away place, the place where even though I tried not to settle in I ended up doing the exact opposite. I like the way to things down there. I still hate where the life is but I ended up liking the life. I'm in this limbo because I don't want to leave my home, and on the other I know I need to leave. There are things that I wish could be another way, but they are not. I don't want to go back down south either, but then I realize it's only temporary. I have to once again leave, something I have come to loathe, and will do anything not to have to do again.
I'm just conflicted, but I know I can't stay here. I need so much more time to readjust to things, and I can not do that right now. It pains me to feel this way, but I was just so taken aback and all I know in my heart is I need to finish all this. Ironic the only way I know how is to leave, for the time. I go back for 2 and a half months and then I'm back home for two weeks for Christmas witch for me even though what I found and what has transpired I will be happy to come home. But until I'm finally done this chapter in my life, it's almost like my home is now foreign. I can easily see about 2 months of readjusting to things in the North. It's just gonna take some time. I know I'm changing and I'm not sure what is going to be different about me. Only Time will tell.
It's almost like, I'm stuck in a rut. I now want to back to that far away place, the place where even though I tried not to settle in I ended up doing the exact opposite. I like the way to things down there. I still hate where the life is but I ended up liking the life. I'm in this limbo because I don't want to leave my home, and on the other I know I need to leave. There are things that I wish could be another way, but they are not. I don't want to go back down south either, but then I realize it's only temporary. I have to once again leave, something I have come to loathe, and will do anything not to have to do again.
I'm just conflicted, but I know I can't stay here. I need so much more time to readjust to things, and I can not do that right now. It pains me to feel this way, but I was just so taken aback and all I know in my heart is I need to finish all this. Ironic the only way I know how is to leave, for the time. I go back for 2 and a half months and then I'm back home for two weeks for Christmas witch for me even though what I found and what has transpired I will be happy to come home. But until I'm finally done this chapter in my life, it's almost like my home is now foreign. I can easily see about 2 months of readjusting to things in the North. It's just gonna take some time. I know I'm changing and I'm not sure what is going to be different about me. Only Time will tell.
Wednesday, September 9, 2009
What Plagues My Soul
I ask myself why I feel the way I do,
she , who so good of a person makes me so angry
the anger that wells up and takes over
It is not what she says but what she does
in order to stave or self destruction
I resort to initiating it in me.
But I am reminded, by a loved one,
That I am not enraged by the action
I am enraged by the behavior.
Wednesday, August 19, 2009
Imaginary Friend
She Looks at me as if She hasn't seen me in years.
She hugs me as if I'm imaginary,
That friend she has that no one could see
In substantial, a figment
as if the only way for me to exist is but in a figurative sense,
I am imaginary because apparently there is no way that a man like me could really exist,
Could actually be real.
It's gone that far, the ways to describe a noble man has changed,
The adjectives that once held strong gave way to a lack of faith.
Sunday, August 2, 2009
Last Mounth
So here we are. Finished yet another month at Full Sail. This month is August, our last month in our degree program, we graduate in four weeks, and I'm pretty excited. There is a small part of me that is still feeling hurt. It's been such a great ride and I think with the realization that it's our last month that you know how much time you don't have. But I think it's just a sign that you should savor the moments that you have with friends.
This month we are in Audio Post Production. I'm really looking forward to it. From looking ahead at our syllabus, it doesn't look as bad as the month we just completed witch was Sessions. The thing is is we had a lot on our plate that month. We had so many things that we were going to be dong outside of class it was a really big pressure cooker of a month. Especially having to get ready for graduation.
To be honest as I am writing this, I am enjoying my day off. Now for those who are not part of my world at Full Sail, this day is the only day this past month that i had off. I been going full steam this whole month and today I can slow down and prepare. Preparation is a very important part of succeeding in the flow of Full Sail. I like being able to have a heads up and our online student portal is just a huge help. I'm really looking forward to doing well this month. I think it's really important in how you end something. Graduation is coming up and we really have 28 days left, and at the end of August we have a week off, although I'm pretty sure there's a catch; I mean it is FUll Sail and catch 22's are common place. Right now I took a shower, shaved, witch is nice peaceful thing to do, and I like looking forward to it. Something about the activity I haven't quite put my finger on yet. It's an important part of having your head in the game is to just settle and be at peace. I go into class and I'm set with the fact that if I do good, and do what I have to that Graduation day will come sooner than I may think. I did my laundry today, got a new ink cartridge, I need gas rather badly, but I should make it to class and back, went to church and grooved out with my partner in crime Aaron. Tomorrow is a nice bright and early day at nine in the morning and another full of knowledge day.
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
Father
Father, can you lift me from this edge?
The hands I felt, the grip would melt to a silver pair
But some time, in a place far from here, I fear
There’s a future where ambition is a shaking shivering stare
And you’ve lost all senses, but you taste those wasted years
Father, please forgive me so
I’d spend those nights, in the orchards, and write to a girl
I’d wait for hours, building her towers
And I’d find a series of stars for her balcony
All for those villa lights, below, and alone in the hills
Father, there’s an ache in my head
There’s a space in my bed, where I will not rest
I’ve gone for hours, the moon’s lost its power
And I’d rather sleep where the sky’s have no keep over me
Let me float from this edge, and over those hills
Strings
Wood, Grained, finished by itself without a voice,
But I will make it sing.
A day , alone a month un played,
yet it’s always ready to play my tune.
To turn words in vibrations
in effect to stir emotions
and to move hearts, and make smiles
even on rainy days.
For each pluck that is made
a painting is being painted
as an artisan tends to his craft
so as I stroke my own fire
because sometimes you have to fix things
that have fallen by the wayside
like an empty and abandoned house.
Thursday, June 11, 2009
Newton Shmuck
They were roofers, brick layers, landscapers
they were the ones that broke there back
all for a lawyer named Herman Shultz.
with the sweat off there backs, the backs that broke
marrow giving way to the force of a schmuck
down on the Newton line.
Everyday from morning to late noon,
toiling over the abysmal tar, and endlessly rapping pipes in teflon
wile the ebenezer mulls over which working stiff he can take for a ride.
and wile that scrooge looks at his work and how far his money can go
those roofers, brick layers, and landscapers all wonder how long they can keep it
in their ripped pockets.
To say that for the day they must go back to their wives is a misnomer.
Herman will go back and spend the remainder of the night with a trophy
while the workers will go home and be fragile with those small bodies
may they go easy with there calloused hands.
Sunday, June 7, 2009
Letter For Mary
It’s hard to believe what a feeling can do to you,
as it like a hand stretching across the straightened route.
something so distant and yet can reach across the distance,
and squeeze the happiness from me.
When will the hurt stop I say,
like an addict looking and following the fix.
and just the same in for the minute, and out for the hour.
You light a cigarette. The one that the man handed to you,
you know he’s in the same place you are. his tie flaps in the direction
the wind itself decides to take it.
He’s in the same place, but a whole other country,
so he’s just that guy smoking a butt standing next to me,
who’s finding solace from a IRS employee.
with the smoke and the rain, the rain damp to my bones,
smoke makes a thought pop and a vision take me away from the pitiful
IRS employee. I see you.
the dress, the flowing hair, the smell, a Lilly in a valley of thorns.
the rain fights to dampen me more, but you, are just so warm,
even from the 1,000 and more miles away I can’t hide from you.
the look of the less fortunate, I smile and know that all of us
hate to see you go, but love to watch you leave.
Mary you mine as well come to grips with it,
there is little you would have to work for.
and for that you don’t have to stand by the curt
and sad IRS employee.
Monday, May 25, 2009
Welcome
So I guess I have met the rainiy season.
In other places it may be sunny. But not here,
Here the sun stays hidden, like a shy child at his first day of school.
But I don’t mind. In fact I welcome it, like a new paycheck.
The sky may be gray and blank. But it gives my spirit a boost of color
So sorley missed, from the drought of studies.
Wile there is a repreieve it is but a little one. So we get a break and a warning, for when the sky will roar and bellow once again.
I would not like to be the out of towners. For only the residents know how the ebb and tide of seasons.
In other places it may be sunny. But not here,
Here the sun stays hidden, like a shy child at his first day of school.
But I don’t mind. In fact I welcome it, like a new paycheck.
The sky may be gray and blank. But it gives my spirit a boost of color
So sorley missed, from the drought of studies.
Thunder rolls, and rolls. Lightning crackse down to earth like a wrathful bullet from the heavens.
Wile there is a repreieve it is but a little one. So we get a break and a warning, for when the sky will roar and bellow once again.
I would not like to be the out of towners. For only the residents know how the ebb and tide of seasons.
It would be hard to grasp after you made your plans, and packed your swim trunks, for a week under the ornage sun. only to be greeted by a protest and a dull complexion.
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